Spend a little time with Emilia, 76, and chances are you’ll hear a story.
”“She’s very chatty,” her daughter Ashley, 36, says with a laugh. Emilia has a gift for breaking the ice and making people comfortable. Growing up, Ashley often found herself listening as her mom connected with those around her.
Emilia has been taking care of the people around her for most of her life. The eldest of eight children, she lost her father at 15 and stepped in to care for her younger siblings.
She later immigrated from the Philippines and raised three children as a single mother. On Oʻahu, she worked physically demanding jobs as a hotel laundry attendant. After raising her children, she was able to return to school to become a CNA.
That independence made what happened in 2021 especially difficult.
A tumor developed on Emilia’s optic nerve, and even after its removal, she permanently lost vision in her eye. Driving was no longer safe, limiting her ability to attend church or run errands on her own.
”“It drastically changed the trajectory of my mom’s life,” Ashley shares. “Her world became much smaller.”
Preparing meals also became difficult. At the recommendation of her partner Jessica, Ashley reached out to Hawaiʻi Meals on Wheels.
Today, regular meal deliveries help Emilia continue to live independently in her own apartment. As her mobility and memory have changed, Ashley says meal deliveries have become increasingly important.
”“Sometimes she forgets to eat or doesn’t have an appetite,” Ashley says. “Hot meal deliveries create a routine and signal that it’s mealtime.”
There have been encouraging changes too. Emilia’s blood sugar and cholesterol levels have improved, and she has even been able to reduce the number of medications she takes daily.
For Ashley, the meals provide reassurance. As the only one of her siblings still living on Oʻahu, she has become the person close by to help “Ma” navigate appointments, groceries, health needs, and the countless details that come with aging.
”“To have that consistent person checking in, it’s a huge relief for me. Guarantee, she has a hot meal. Guarantee, there’s a checkpoint,” Ashley shares.
Ashley acknowledges that she has something many caregivers do not: a strong circle of support. Her partner Jessica works in social services and also helps care for older family members, so she understands the challenges firsthand. Emilia’s sisters are part of that circle too. Aunty Fanny steps in when Ashley needs time away, while Aunty Marina makes comforting Filipino dishes when Emilia is craving the familiar foods she loves.
Hawaiʻi Meals on Wheels is privileged to be part of their circle of care.
”“I want to be the healthiest person I can be, so I can continue to caregive. I’m realizing it’s okay to take breaks. I even went on a vacation in May!” Ashley shares.
Ashley dreams of someday having a home where her mom can live with her. For now, Emilia still has enough independence to live in a place of her own, and Ashley wants to protect that for as long as possible.
It’s a fitting chapter for a woman who spent so much of her life caring for her siblings, raising her children, and serving others. Now, Ashley is helping care for her, and Hawaiʻi Meals on Wheels is making sure she doesn’t have to do it alone.
”“I’m so grateful for Hawaiʻi Meals on Wheels. You take care of my mom and so many kūpuna. I also feel seen as a caregiver,” Ashley shares.
Your generosity makes this care possible. Thank you for being part of Emilia and Ashley’s circle of support!
